Everyone is seeking a purpose in life. For some people, finding a purpose comes naturally. They follow in the footsteps of their parents. They have known their intentions in life since they were little children. Others have moments of clarity that make them realize what they want to pursue in life. Though some people ultimately find a purpose, a lot of us struggle to find something that truly matters to us and to follow it. All my life I have fought to find something to dedicate my life to as I know a lot of you have too. Through my journeys, I have found some reasons as to why it is so hard to find a purpose in life.
We struggle to find purpose in life because the North American culture defines itself through careers and work-related traits, our purposes change in life, and there is no ultimate purpose that we need to pursue. There are a lot of obstacles to finding meaning in life, but the most notable one is our own perceptions of purpose. We cannot find our mission in life if we believe ourselves incapable of having one.
Why Is It Difficult to Find Your Purpose?
Finding a purpose in life is a goal for many, if not all of us. However, there are a few obstacles to that quest.
Career-Based Society
In the North American culture, people are defined through their careers. If someone asks you to describe yourself, you always tell them what you do for a living. With this mindset, it can be difficult to find our purpose in life. For a lot of people, their purposes will not be based on what they do for a career. However, society expects them to find meaning within their jobs.
When you are searching for your purpose in life, it is hard when what you do for a career is not something you love. We have all had jobs that we have hated. How are you expected to find meaning in life when society tells you your purpose lies in your career but you hate it? Because we base so much of our expectations and hopes on finding meaning in our jobs, we do not emphasize other areas in which we can find happiness.
For me, I found purpose in my hobbies. I love what I do and it makes me happy. Society would be much happier if we only realized that work is not everything. Our careers are not the end-all of our lives. We need to pursue other avenues of happiness to find our true purposes in life.
Perceptions
We are searching for purpose in life. Nevertheless, our perceptions of purpose and meaning in life are hindering us. They keep us from finding true happiness.
The search for purpose can be painful in itself. When you continuously keep looking for something that is not within your reach, it can make you feel empty. Our perceptions of purpose are a reason why it is never in our reach. We need to educate ourselves on our perceptions and change them to be able to finally find meaning in life.
Purposes Change
A reason we have trouble finding a mission in life is that purpose is not static. Our purposes change over time. For someone who dedicates themselves to their family and their children, their intentions need to change when their children move out. There are a lot of other examples of purposes in life that change over time. We limit ourselves when we believe that we never change. Sticking to one meaning in life that no longer gives us the same sense of satisfaction hinders us. We cannot base our purpose on something that no longer applies to us.
When we are searching for a purpose, we are looking for something that will never change. We are supposed to always find satisfaction from this one meaning in life. That is unrealistic and makes the search for a purpose so much harder. We are constantly changing; yet, we are still searching for the same mission we thought we wanted as kids or as younger versions of ourselves. Purposes change. We need to realize that before trying to find our own purpose.
No Ultimate Purpose
A second perception we have that keeps us from finding meaning in life is the belief that there is only one purpose for us. We might believe that our purpose is work, family, or something else. However, this belief is one of the problems in the search for purpose. No one finds meaning in their life from only one source. We are not only limited to one reason to live; yet, everyone seems to believe this is the case.
There is no ultimate purpose for any of us. If what you are searching for is one topmost purpose, you will most likely never find it. People are more than just one area of life. We are not just family, work, or hobbies. We all have purposes in our life, as in multiple purposes. If you allow yourself to imagine that your purpose is spread across all the areas in your life, you might find more satisfaction.
We have trouble finding a purpose in life because we are searching for the one ultimate purpose that will be the only source of happiness for us. People want something to dedicate their entire lives and beings toward. However, that view is harmful and a quick way to experience burnout. There will never be only one cause you can dedicate yourself to.
How to Improve Your Perceptions of Purpose
The best way to help yourself find your purpose(s) in life is to change your perceptions.
First, you need to realize that not everything in life orbits your career. There is so much more to you than what you do for a living. There are so many things that you love that you might have left behind because of your job. It is time to notice that other things in your life matter just as much and sometimes more than your career. Your job is not what defines you. Your purpose does not have to revolve around your career. You might be having trouble finding your purpose because you are focusing on what you do for a living and not on the other areas in your life. Try examining what you like to do outside of your career and what really matters to you. Your purpose might lie in something you thought was just a hobby.
You may have misplaced your purpose when you lost someone or a job. It can be difficult to recover when you believed that everything you were was wrapped around that person or that career. There comes a time when we need to realize that purposes change. We cannot base our life on something that we think will never vary. It is only going to hurt you when the source of your happiness is no longer in your life. You have multiple sources of happiness. You do not only have one ultimate purpose. It might take some time to work on, but you should be looking at different areas in your life for happiness instead of expecting it to always come from one source. That just sets you up for heartbreak.
It is difficult for some people to find meaning in life because of their perceptions. We need to change our views on purpose if we are ever to find true happiness in our lives. It is time to end our search for purpose and start enjoying our lives.
If you are struggling with finding your purpose in life, you might want to try seeking a psychologist. They can help you change your perceptions of purpose and improve your life. The American Psychological Association has some great information on how to find help.
